No profanity? No problem.

I LOVE swearing. How I am able to curse like a sailor when I’m not on the radio, yet avoid dropping a major F-Bomb on air is probably my only true talent.

Not that I have an impeccable record, but I only dropped the F-Bomb once and it was at my first gig in radio way back in the 90’s.

Got a call, too. Lady called up and said, “Did you just say fuck on the radio?”

I of course denied it. Said she was probably listening to a different radio station.

Keeping it clean isn’t easy. You get on a random subject that you’re passionate about like parking in downtown La Crosse or some other topic and the next thing you know….BOOM! Swear words.

So, what’s your favorite profanity free insult?

The one I hear all the time(because of my career choice) is “You have a face for radio”….duh. I didn’t get into radio because I’m a dreamboat. I know I’m rather unattractive.

I like calling people a Cotton-headed NinnyMuggins

Or SonOfADiddly

A recent thread on Reddit asked people what their favorite profanity-free insult was and some of the better responses are:

  • You’re the reason shampoo has instructions
  • As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?
  • You’re the reason we need lifeguards in the gene pool

Not sure if it made the list, but I also like “You could ruin a wet dream”, and in a specific situation, I like “couldn’t sing his way out of a paper bag”.

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Brian Simpson

Unapologetic fan of the Red Sox, Patriots, Bruins & Celtics. Lover of powerful, dark beers. Married with NO kids. Ever. Lover of doggos. Not so much cats.

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